DgtizeD

The past week or so has been full of frustrating experiences with things that are supposed to work one way, but spontaneously decide to work in ways in which they don’t work.

Of Allen Wrenches

Specifically, they aren’t supposed to strip the head of the associated screw. Given that the associated screw is on the wheel axle of a rollerblade, it makes it very difficult to replace the wheel mounted on the axle. Since said wheel is the rear wheel and a centimeter smaller in diameter than the new replacement wheels, it makes the rollerblades, and by association the newly purchased wheels unusable for their intended purpose.

Needless to say I was not impressed. My options at this point appear to be

1. Drill out the screw/axle and buy a new axle.
2. Find a skateshop that can replace the axle through some similar process
3. Give up on rollerblades alltogether

Unfortunately this city seems to be short on skate shops. Ordering online is probably possible, however that means another week or so of waiting, plus actually finding a drill to remove the axle.

Of Perl Duct Tape

I am considering permently removing perl from my resume. It’s just not worth the pain. I want real objects, and real references, and significantly less kludges. Remember kids, not only is perl the duct tape of the internet, it’s also made of duct tape itself. It is in fact, recursive duct tape. Now the problem with duct tape is there are random things it simply will not hold together, but one is never sure of what exactly these items are. Perl appears to have the same problem, except it nearly always sticks to everything else, but it slowly unravels internally. It also leave sticky residue all over anything it’s used on, consistantly requires re-duct taping, and frequently the jury-rig gives up entirely and needs to be replaced with a shiny new jury-rig, all set and primed for it’s own impending doom.

Actually this one is less of a problem in the last week, so much as a general gripe for the whole summer. Down with perl! Up with ruby, and possibly the snake language! Viva la revolution!

On the bathroom wall at Meshuggah’s (a local coffeehouse),

Roses are red,
and ready for plucking,
your 16,
and ready for …
highschool

Above a urinal at a gas station in Georgia —

WWJD

and scrawled next to it in pencil —

not write on bathroom walls…

And so I transfer the meme’s to the internet. It’s interesting to note how different locations deal with graffiti. Some places view it as a problem, and remove it as soon as possible, some places are obviously in disrepair and the grafitti breeds prolifically. Sometimes bathrooms are otherwise quite nice, but either provide specific places to write, or simply appear to cultivate the writing that is there. I’ve seen places go as far as to put up chalk boards in the bathroom, which I think is actually one of the best approaches I have ever seen (unfortunately that is nearly the only redeeming quality of that location).

The Writings on the Stall is apparently an entire site devoted to sharing these poems, commentaries, truth’s, lies, and trash that line the walls of so many stalls. How inventive the human mind is while excreting waste. Or are they one and the same?

Sadly, they are not quite as amusing when transcribed on a web page, a medium entirely outside of their natural habitat. Something about reading the phrases in neat 12 point Times New Roman removes an essential part of what makes the grafitti so engaging. We need some sort of digital blackboard that allows the same level of imprecise scrawl, contrasted by arbitrarily impeccable calligraphy, but smudged at the far edge by a hastily (or is it lazily) written note for the future.